Friday, November 01, 2013

halloween things

A lot of people my age still like to go trick-or-treating. I can almost understand why they would want to do that.

"Oh, it's so much fun! It never get's old!!"

"Dude you get a bunch of free candy, what's not to love?"

All that.

I'm about done with trick-or-treating. Maybe when I'm older, I'll be that cool mom who dresses up as a cow girl and goes out with the kids.

The problem with trick-or-treating is, it's a shit ton of walking, you get sweaty and cold at the same exact time, and every couple minutes you have to throw on your polite innocent face and say the same exact script.

Kind of nauseating, I must say.

I'd rather be crashing on the couch with my guys, watching family guy, maybe eating some leftover candy from the front door stash, and just talking. No walking, no sweating, no script. Which is exactly what I ended up doing last night.

But, if you must know, I still dressed up. I decided to dress up as Holden Caulfield from J.D. Salinger's Catcher in the Rye. 

I know that sounds depressing, considering his character, but oh well. It's by far my favorite book that I've read for school. 

And hell, I couldn't think of anything else. Besides, I love cross-dressing, and this is one of those occasions where it's a little more acceptable.

If you haven't read the book yet, and you're over thirteen years of age, I highly recommend it. It's not dense, it's not hard language, but it's not necessarily action packed either. Yet, I still found it comforting to visit Holden every night and see how he was doing.

Aren't I just beautiful...

Pardon my face... and the stupid mirror picture thing. I was having a wicked shitty day when I took this. Forgot to take my meds that day, and that came back and kicked me in the ass real hard. I learned my lesson, that's for sure.


All "men's" clothing, including a sports bra so my boobs don't exist. Last time I checked, Holden does not have breasts. So I had to compensate.

One of my brother's friends, Matt, pointed out the irony. I was dressing up as Holden, Holden refers to everybody as phonies, and I was one goddamn phony. It's funny. Why aren't you laughing.

A small handful of people fully appreciated the joke. Another good fraction of people knew who I was, including a couple of freshman who had already read the book. The rest thought I was just dressed up as some classy guy wearing his hunting hat backwards.

And yes, my English teacher got a big kick out of the costume when I wore to to school on Halloween.

Ty explaining Halloween to someone outside of our odd country. I came up with a make believe skit. (I've always wanted to try play-writing, so here we go).

"So... here's Halloween in a nutshell. On October 31st, kids dress up and go around door-to-door at night, and ask for candy. It's supposed to be a scary trickster kind of holiday, and some people like to scare others at night time."

"Why is it October 31st?"

"Uh. I dunno. It just... is."

"And.. these kids? What do they dress up as?"

"Well... pretty much anything, really. Some dress up in more 'traditional' costumes, like a witch, pumpkin, or a ghost... and--"

"Wait what? Why pumpkins? Pumpkins aren't scary... just orange, no?"

"Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention, pumpkins are also a part of it, since pumpkins are in harvest during Halloween. A lot of people carve faces and patterns into pumpkins, and put a candle inside so it glows. We call these Jack-o-Lanterns."

"Who's Jack??"


" you were saying about the kids?"

"Yeah they basically dress up as whatever they want, really. A lot of teenagers and adults do it too, but people typically stop trick-or-treating when they're in High School."

"Trick or.. what??"

"Oh, that's what we call when we go around and ask for candy... the kids go up to the door, ring the doorbell, and say, 'Trick or Treat!' Basically, they're asking the people for a trick or a treat. Nowadays, people just hand out candy."


"Yeah... that's pretty much all you need to know..."

"Your country's weird."


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